It is hard to believe that school ended just 8 weeks ago! It has been a crazy summer and it's almost time to head back to Ghana for another year! Just 4 weeks after we arrived back from Ghana Becca and I got MARRIED!!! On June 28th we started the journey of the rest of our lives together! It has been amazing so far and can only get better as we learn to serve and love our Savior and each other. I forget who said this, but I read a while back that marriage is not meant to just make you happy and satisfied, but it is meant to show you all of your insufficiencies and make you depend more and more on Christ. I am excited to learn and grow and follow wherever God leads us now and in the future!
One thing that God has been teaching me over the past few weeks and the even the few months before the wedding is that I cannot love Becca (or anyone else for that matter) as much as Christ loves her. I included that fact in my vows, that I will love her the best that I can knowing that Christ loves her so much more than I ever can. Marriage and ministry in Ghana has been teaching me how insufficient I am to love like Christ. I think of myself way more often than I should and I do so many things and say so many things that are all about me. I think I'm something special and should worry about myself above everything else, when Christ calls me to do the exact opposite. He says that whoever wants to be first should become the servant of all! How?! I don't know! But I know that Christ is working in me as to what that means in my life. I catch myself thinking about how everything will look to others and what they will think of me. Or I catch myself thinking of how this is going to effect me and my life. My prayer is that God would continue to teach me what it means to love others above myself and stop being so selfish! It is a work in progress and will always be a work in progress!
I'm gonna keep this blog short because Becca and I have started a new blog together and will be updating that in the next two weeks! I will send out the new blog from this blog when we our first entry is posted! Until then, it is time to pack and get ready to go back HOME!!
Tuesday, July 23, 2013
Friday, May 10, 2013
Life as I Know it
For those of you that aren't Becca, Pete and a few other people here in Ghana this blog post may come as a surprise. I am not a very outspoken person when it comes to things that God is working on in my life or things that I am struggling with. The past 2 months have been some of the toughest months of my life.
(Beware: This blog post may seem like I am rambling on and on about all of these simple truths that we have all heard over and over again. That's because it is. I have been learning so much over the past 2 months and so much of it is simple truths that are revolutionizing my thinking in brand new ways. God has to teach us things over and over again because we are so stubborn and forget so many times! God is teaching me what all of these things mean because I am finally open and letting him into my life. I have finally confessed to him and others my sin and the shame that goes with it! If you haven't done that in your life, do it! And seek out someone you can talk to who can encourage you in seeking God to change you from the inside out!)
I have always been "comfortable" in my life. I grew up in a Christian home, asked Jesus to save me when I was 5, went to Christian school, went to Christian college, and now I'm a missionary Christian school teacher in Ghana. You may think, "Well, Ghana isn't that comfortable!" But it is when you think about all of the luxuries that I enjoy and all of the Christians I am around. I have always been a person who tries to please the people around me. It started with my parents. I always wanted to be good at what I did, whether that be school, sports, or religion, I always wanted to look like I had it under control (I still want everyone to think I have it all under control!). I did what was right and what looked good because I wanted to look good. So many of the things that I did were because I didn't want to get in trouble or because I wanted people to think that I was a great Christian (now, don't get me wrong, there were plenty of good things that I did because those were my convictions and I was following what Christ wanted). My heart and mind were not committed to Christ, but were committed to looking like a good person to the people around me. Just like Paul/Saul was doing when he was persecuting Christians. He thought that he was doing the right thing because the people who he had learned from and the religious leaders of the religion he grew up in told him he was doing the right thing. I was the same way, I was doing the right thing because that's what I thought God wanted and because people around me thought I was doing good. Galatians 1:10-11 is Paul sharing how he used to be. "Am I now trying to win the approval of men, or of God? Or am I trying to please men? If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a servant of Christ." I have to ask myself that question! There were and are so many times where I am not a servant of Christ! I am a servant of all the people around me and of my own selfish desire to be accepted to people more than by Christ!
Here's the catch. I am not good. I am not ok. I don't have it all under control. I am a dirty, rotten sinner who's good works are like "filthy rags" (Isaiah 64:6) before a all-knowing, holy God. I, like Paul, was trying to make everyone think I was a great person, when really I was hurting and just seeking to be accepted. You know where the only real acceptance comes from?! It comes from Christ who died for me even while I was like "filthy rags" and was in complete rebellion against him! It seems so simple and straight forward! I have been taught these things for my entire life and thought I understood them!! Did I really understand that God had set me apart from birth? That he is the one who pursued me? And is still pursuing me?! It's not about me trying to please Him, it is ALL ABOUT HIM! I cannot on my own power, do anything that will bring me to a right relationship with the only good and holy God.
Now you may say, "Josiah, I understand all of these things. How come you are just now realizing them?" And I say, "Because I had allowed so many other things to consume my mind and heart besides Christ!" I thought that I was doing well because I wasn't doing anything "really bad" like so many other people. I was reading my Bible for a few minutes, I was praying for a few minutes a day, and I was staying away from watching or doing anything that people would think was really bad. God doesn't want that for me or for you! He wants our whole lives! Not just what we think will make us look good to others!
I feel as if all of this will mean nothing to so many of you because I can't put into words all that God is teaching me through simple truth found in His Word. So let me share with you some passages and verses that I just can't get over. I pray that God will use them in your life the same way He is using them in mine.
In 2 Corinthians 12 Paul talks about his "thorn in the flesh" and how the Lord will not take it away from him. Verses 9-10: But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly in my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong." How can you boast in your weaknesses?! That doesn't make any sense, but that's what Paul says! God is teaching me to not be ashamed that I am not strong enough to resist temptation, but to boast in my weakness! How do I boast in my weakness?! I constantly speak this truth in prayer throughout my day, "God you know that I can't do this on my own! I will trust in you as my strength!" That can be related to anything I am struggling with that day and that moment!! And you know what, when I look to Christ, those weaknesses don't seem so bad!
Another passage that I can't get over is Hebrews 4:14-16, "Therefore, since we have a great high priest who has gone through the heavens, Jesus the Son of God, let us hold firmly to the faith we profess. For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are - yet was without sin. Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need." Jesus was tempted in EVERY WAY we are, and yet was without sin! So there is no way we can say, well it is just not possible to defeat this sin! Guess who we have living inside of us?! Holy Spirit!! Who just so happens to be God! Verse 16 tells us to approach the throne of grace with confidence then because we have Jesus up there covering over all of our sin and shame with GRACE! Jesus is there and so is the Holy Spirit every time we need him! So many times we just don't ask and so we don't receive! Prayer has been a big part of these past 2 months for me and I will share a little bit more about that in the next paragraph.
In order to keep this post down to a manageable read I will end with this set of verses from Philippians 3:7-14, "But whatever was to my profit I now consider loss for the sake of Christ. What is more, I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus as my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them rubbish, that I may gain Christ and be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which is through faith in Christ - the righteousness that comes from and is by faith. I want to know Christ and the power of his resurrection and the fellowship of sharing in his sufferings, becoming like him in his death, and so, somehow, to attain the resurrection from the dead. Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus." Wow! What a passage! The first couple of verses are pretty famous, but what has really stuck out to me is the fact that it is not just about considering everything a loss and sacrificing everything for Christ. The real goal here is everything is a loss "compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord and knowing "Christ and the power of his resurrection." So what is our ultimate goal?! To know Christ and his resurrection!! If I am constantly reminding myself of that truth and the power of it. Then Paul says, "I'm not there yet, but that's ok!" Crazy to think that the man that wrote so much of the New Testament says in one passage that he will boast in his weaknesses and then he says that he hasn't obtained all of what Christ has done for him! He is ok with not being there yet, but he is going to strive to get there! Forgetting everything he has done because it is covered in grace, and pressing on to win the prize which is ultimately fulfilled in knowing Christ completely!! I know I told you that I was going to talk about prayer, and I have taken a long time to get there, so here it is. Prayer in my life has been radically changed. I spend more time in prayer in the mornings yes (and that is vital to start my day off right), but throughout my day I am learning to talk to God about the simplest of things. God wants to hear all about everything in my life, from temptations to things that just make me laugh. He wants me to be grateful for those things that make me happy and tell him about it, and he wants me to share with him and depend on him in those areas that I am weak and I struggle. When I spend my day talking to Him instead of letting my mind be filled up with all of the thoughts in my head, it is amazing how much Christ's power and his resurrection fills up my life. I am not even close to understanding just how much Christ loves me and loves you, but I am learning through His Word that no matter what I have done and no matter what is happening, he cares! He is the one who has pursued me and is still pursuing me! Not by what I have done or because of what I have done, but because of who He is and what He desires in me! I told Becca that this is my prayer for her and for us as we get married in just 49 days and I pray this for you too as you read this my ramblings that only God can use: "And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge - that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God." (Ephesians 3:17b-19)
I don't feel like I need to end this blog post with any big prayer request other than to pray for the students here at AIS, the other teachers, City of Refuge, the neighborhood kids, and anyone else I come in contact with would know the love of Christ better and would see that difference in my life.
(Beware: This blog post may seem like I am rambling on and on about all of these simple truths that we have all heard over and over again. That's because it is. I have been learning so much over the past 2 months and so much of it is simple truths that are revolutionizing my thinking in brand new ways. God has to teach us things over and over again because we are so stubborn and forget so many times! God is teaching me what all of these things mean because I am finally open and letting him into my life. I have finally confessed to him and others my sin and the shame that goes with it! If you haven't done that in your life, do it! And seek out someone you can talk to who can encourage you in seeking God to change you from the inside out!)
I have always been "comfortable" in my life. I grew up in a Christian home, asked Jesus to save me when I was 5, went to Christian school, went to Christian college, and now I'm a missionary Christian school teacher in Ghana. You may think, "Well, Ghana isn't that comfortable!" But it is when you think about all of the luxuries that I enjoy and all of the Christians I am around. I have always been a person who tries to please the people around me. It started with my parents. I always wanted to be good at what I did, whether that be school, sports, or religion, I always wanted to look like I had it under control (I still want everyone to think I have it all under control!). I did what was right and what looked good because I wanted to look good. So many of the things that I did were because I didn't want to get in trouble or because I wanted people to think that I was a great Christian (now, don't get me wrong, there were plenty of good things that I did because those were my convictions and I was following what Christ wanted). My heart and mind were not committed to Christ, but were committed to looking like a good person to the people around me. Just like Paul/Saul was doing when he was persecuting Christians. He thought that he was doing the right thing because the people who he had learned from and the religious leaders of the religion he grew up in told him he was doing the right thing. I was the same way, I was doing the right thing because that's what I thought God wanted and because people around me thought I was doing good. Galatians 1:10-11 is Paul sharing how he used to be. "Am I now trying to win the approval of men, or of God? Or am I trying to please men? If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a servant of Christ." I have to ask myself that question! There were and are so many times where I am not a servant of Christ! I am a servant of all the people around me and of my own selfish desire to be accepted to people more than by Christ!
Here's the catch. I am not good. I am not ok. I don't have it all under control. I am a dirty, rotten sinner who's good works are like "filthy rags" (Isaiah 64:6) before a all-knowing, holy God. I, like Paul, was trying to make everyone think I was a great person, when really I was hurting and just seeking to be accepted. You know where the only real acceptance comes from?! It comes from Christ who died for me even while I was like "filthy rags" and was in complete rebellion against him! It seems so simple and straight forward! I have been taught these things for my entire life and thought I understood them!! Did I really understand that God had set me apart from birth? That he is the one who pursued me? And is still pursuing me?! It's not about me trying to please Him, it is ALL ABOUT HIM! I cannot on my own power, do anything that will bring me to a right relationship with the only good and holy God.
Now you may say, "Josiah, I understand all of these things. How come you are just now realizing them?" And I say, "Because I had allowed so many other things to consume my mind and heart besides Christ!" I thought that I was doing well because I wasn't doing anything "really bad" like so many other people. I was reading my Bible for a few minutes, I was praying for a few minutes a day, and I was staying away from watching or doing anything that people would think was really bad. God doesn't want that for me or for you! He wants our whole lives! Not just what we think will make us look good to others!
I feel as if all of this will mean nothing to so many of you because I can't put into words all that God is teaching me through simple truth found in His Word. So let me share with you some passages and verses that I just can't get over. I pray that God will use them in your life the same way He is using them in mine.
In 2 Corinthians 12 Paul talks about his "thorn in the flesh" and how the Lord will not take it away from him. Verses 9-10: But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly in my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong." How can you boast in your weaknesses?! That doesn't make any sense, but that's what Paul says! God is teaching me to not be ashamed that I am not strong enough to resist temptation, but to boast in my weakness! How do I boast in my weakness?! I constantly speak this truth in prayer throughout my day, "God you know that I can't do this on my own! I will trust in you as my strength!" That can be related to anything I am struggling with that day and that moment!! And you know what, when I look to Christ, those weaknesses don't seem so bad!
Another passage that I can't get over is Hebrews 4:14-16, "Therefore, since we have a great high priest who has gone through the heavens, Jesus the Son of God, let us hold firmly to the faith we profess. For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are - yet was without sin. Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need." Jesus was tempted in EVERY WAY we are, and yet was without sin! So there is no way we can say, well it is just not possible to defeat this sin! Guess who we have living inside of us?! Holy Spirit!! Who just so happens to be God! Verse 16 tells us to approach the throne of grace with confidence then because we have Jesus up there covering over all of our sin and shame with GRACE! Jesus is there and so is the Holy Spirit every time we need him! So many times we just don't ask and so we don't receive! Prayer has been a big part of these past 2 months for me and I will share a little bit more about that in the next paragraph.
In order to keep this post down to a manageable read I will end with this set of verses from Philippians 3:7-14, "But whatever was to my profit I now consider loss for the sake of Christ. What is more, I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus as my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them rubbish, that I may gain Christ and be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which is through faith in Christ - the righteousness that comes from and is by faith. I want to know Christ and the power of his resurrection and the fellowship of sharing in his sufferings, becoming like him in his death, and so, somehow, to attain the resurrection from the dead. Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus." Wow! What a passage! The first couple of verses are pretty famous, but what has really stuck out to me is the fact that it is not just about considering everything a loss and sacrificing everything for Christ. The real goal here is everything is a loss "compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord and knowing "Christ and the power of his resurrection." So what is our ultimate goal?! To know Christ and his resurrection!! If I am constantly reminding myself of that truth and the power of it. Then Paul says, "I'm not there yet, but that's ok!" Crazy to think that the man that wrote so much of the New Testament says in one passage that he will boast in his weaknesses and then he says that he hasn't obtained all of what Christ has done for him! He is ok with not being there yet, but he is going to strive to get there! Forgetting everything he has done because it is covered in grace, and pressing on to win the prize which is ultimately fulfilled in knowing Christ completely!! I know I told you that I was going to talk about prayer, and I have taken a long time to get there, so here it is. Prayer in my life has been radically changed. I spend more time in prayer in the mornings yes (and that is vital to start my day off right), but throughout my day I am learning to talk to God about the simplest of things. God wants to hear all about everything in my life, from temptations to things that just make me laugh. He wants me to be grateful for those things that make me happy and tell him about it, and he wants me to share with him and depend on him in those areas that I am weak and I struggle. When I spend my day talking to Him instead of letting my mind be filled up with all of the thoughts in my head, it is amazing how much Christ's power and his resurrection fills up my life. I am not even close to understanding just how much Christ loves me and loves you, but I am learning through His Word that no matter what I have done and no matter what is happening, he cares! He is the one who has pursued me and is still pursuing me! Not by what I have done or because of what I have done, but because of who He is and what He desires in me! I told Becca that this is my prayer for her and for us as we get married in just 49 days and I pray this for you too as you read this my ramblings that only God can use: "And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge - that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God." (Ephesians 3:17b-19)
I don't feel like I need to end this blog post with any big prayer request other than to pray for the students here at AIS, the other teachers, City of Refuge, the neighborhood kids, and anyone else I come in contact with would know the love of Christ better and would see that difference in my life.
Monday, January 7, 2013
Yeah, I get to marry my best friend…..
Well, Christmas break is over and the second semester of
school is about to start! Much has happened over the past couple of months in
my life.
I’ll start with the big news from Christmas break in South
Africa. On Friday the 14th of
December me and Becca left from Accra and flew down to Johannesburg, South
Africa. Becca’s parents picked us up
from the airport and we spent the next couple of days resting and enjoying the “cool”
of South Africa’s summer compared to Ghana’s normal, everyday heat! On Monday night my parents arrived in
Johannesburg. On Tuesday Becca’s older
brother Michael and grandma (Nanny) arrived in Johannesburg. Thursday morning started the adventure! We all jumped into the van and headed for
Kruger! Well, the journey didn’t go
exactly as planned. What was intended to
be a 4 or 5 hour journey ended up taking 12 hours!! Oh well, plenty of time spent enjoying
everyone’s company and anticipating the evening’s event. I’m not going to share all of the mushy-gushy
details (sorry Kate), but the evening’s event just happened to be me asking
Becca to marry me! Lucky for me she said
yes and the next hour was spent waking up all of the cabins around us to tell
our families that we were engaged!! So
yes, if you didn’t know already, I am engaged to the most amazing girl in the
world who I spent two years living on the same street with at Liberty but never
met and had to wait until we were in Ghana to get to know (and yes I know that is a run on sentence but I
couldn’t help but share that funny piece of information that I thought is
interesting and awesome how God’s timing is perfect and amazing and how I can’t
wait to spend the rest of my life with Becca!).
Needless to say, I am excited about this upcoming summer and
the wedding, but I am also really excited about this next semester and the
opportunities I will have through Christ here in Ghana. I will have many opportunities to share the
love of Christ with those around me and am going to share a couple of those
opportunities with you in the next couple paragraphs!
A month or so ago I learned some important information about
FeFe. You remember who he is
right?! He is one of the neighborhood
boys who hangs out with us quite often.
He actually comes to church with us almost every Sunday. A few Sundays ago, the pastor came up to me
and asked if I knew that FeFe was in the kid’s room praying to Allah. I had no idea and immediately went to talk to
him. After talking to him for a few
minutes about it I realized some important things that I hope you will join with
me in praying for FeFe and other kids on the street: 1. Many of these kids have a Christian influence
along with a Muslim or tribal influence in what they believe about God and
supernatural things. 2. This confuses
them and makes them believe that the Bible and other things are all truth. (FeFe believes that Allah and God are the
same. I tried to explain to him the
differences, but it is tough to explain to a 12 year old boy who hears from
both sides since his dad is a Muslim) 3.
These kids need prayer and a lot of teaching to help them understand that only
Christ can save!! I hope you will join
with me in praying for them and for their parents to understand that none of
these other things (Allah and tribal religions) can save them!! The two do not mix!
I am also excited for the upcoming semester at school. Many times it is easy to get focused on all
the things I need to do and forget the eternal purpose in everything that I
do. Over Christmas break I have been
reminded of the purpose for why I am here and the eternal significance of
everything I do and my attitude in how I do it!
I have been reminded to DREAM BIG and pray for God to do big things
through me and in me. So many times I
get caught up in the daily things and forget to depend and trust Him and no
that HE IS GREAT and HE IS GOOD! So I
need to depend on Him and seek His power in all that I do. So please pray for me to be reminded each day
of the eternal significance of my time spent here no matter who I am with or
what I am doing that day (also, please remind yourself of this truth in your
life! Everything you do can be used to
glorify our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ!).
I hope you all had a Merry Christmas and a wonderful New Year
and are looking forward to all of the things God will do in and through you if
only we will let Him and ask Him to!
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